Why don't you tell me what you really think?
by A.Pseudonym
Summary: Matsuda tells L what he thinks of him... Short one-shot just for fun.


A/N: AU as to what people were at the same place at one time. This is a sort of experiment - Feedback appreciated.

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"Ryuuzaki, I need to talk to you!" Matsuda said. Even speaking to his superior that impolitely made the colour rise in Matsuda's face, but he was serious about this, and he would make sure he was taken seriously.

L turned towards him with an unreadable expression on his face. The rest of the task force were downstairs in the computer room; they were alone.

"I know I haven't said anything before... but I'm not happy with the way you're treating me, Ryuuzaki-san. You have been bad-mouthing me in front of the others, calling me stupid, and ordered me around like your personal butler... and... it's _not okay!_ "

L didn't interrupt him, and even though the lack of feedback made it that much harder, Matsuda continued, "It's not my job to fetch you coffee. It is my job to try and help solve the Kira case, but when I take the initiative and we get useful information out of it, you act like it's just a fluke, that any good that came out of it was _despite_ my 'blunder' or even the fact that it was my idea in the first place..."

It really was a relief, getting this off his chest, and he was just getting warmed up. L just stared at him, his pale face still, his eyes wide.

"And another thing; just because I try to keep a positive attitude, it doesn't mean I'm naive or childish. It might not seem like I get angry like Aizawa-san, or Yagami-san, but when you talk about me behind my back, I _do_ get angry, Ryuuzaki! I _am_ angry!"

L still said nothing, but his whole body was trembling a little. Whether it was from fear or anger, Matsuda couldn't tell, and he wasn't going to let either one stop him now.

"I'm used to being ignored or made fun of by them, you know. Used to not being taken seriously by my colleagues. But you're our leader now and you should set a good example. They look up to you! I... look up to you too." Matsuda could feel his face flush again but pushed on, "I don't have to be here, you know, if I'm so useless. I could have left with the other 90 of the police force, but I stayed because I believed in what we're trying to do, and I believed in you, L. Obviously that feeling is not mutual. I understand that I'm not a genius like you, but what _you_ _don't_ understand is that when you call someone stupid and useless it _hurts. _You see, normal people have these things called feelings! But I guess you wouldn't know anything about that."

L's eyes were almost bulging out of his head but he kept his silence.

"Are you listening to me? You might be the smartest person in the world, but your people skills SUCK! I've worked damn hard for you and never got any recognition for it, only 'Matsuda is no use, Matsuda is being stupid again'! That's not how you treat your colleagues! I'm not an analytical machine, I'm not some idiot savant or bloody autistic or whatever you are that make you unable to realise that _I'm a real human being with real feelings_!

Matsuda shook L back and forth, quivering with rage. Suddenly there was a sound of a door opening behind him and footsteps approaching. He stopped and dropped his hands to his sides, trying to look normal.

"Matsuda-san." A voice from the doorway. Matsuda turned around, reluctantly. "Near is looking for that finger puppet."

"I-I'm sorry. I just found it here on the floor. I was going to bring it down... sorry."

Matsuda pulled the piece of plastic off his fingertip, leaving it damp and slightly spongy.

"May I have it please?" L held out a white long-fingered hand towards him.

"Of course, Ryuuzaki-san." Matsuda put the tiny plastic replica of L in the outstretched palm. His hand was still trembling from the adrenaline. He bowed nervously. His stomach was full of butterflies, their wings laced with acid.

"Thank you." L closed his fingers around it and shoved both his hands deep into his pockets, then turned around to leave. Matsuda let out a deep, shaky breath. L had reached the doorway and opened the door when he paused and turned his head half-way to the side so Matsuda could only see his profile.

"One more thing," he said. "This room also has surveillance equipment installed."

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the end! :)


End file.
